Moving toward advocacy

The other day I was writing a new post and we lost power in the house, (do not ask why I will get in trouble) and did not go back to what I was writing. So now I will.

When Letty & I found NAMI we found support and education and tools and a whole lot of new friends that share so much in common. At that time support was what we needed, we wanted to come and talk and listen and leave and comeback. We did that for quite some time, finally someone asked if we would help with something and we said "we would." Then we were asked if we would help in the fundraising for the Walk and we said "of course" and we did.

We have grown to realize the importance of getting support and giving support. But more importantly we are advocates. We advocate for our son with his caregivers. We advocate for NAMI with friends that need what NAMI offers. We advocate for mental health issues at work, play, church and wherever we can.

People need support and comfort and information. But as our personal situations becomes more stable and less of a crisis I see a pattern of not moving towards advocacy but away from the support. I find that alarming and wonder why that is.

I have some ideas about that. Our lives are full. We only have so much time and cannot add another meeting, committee or project to our already busy life. We do not want to give back. We come for the benefit of the support and comfort but when we are asked to become a supporter or comforter we head for the hills. We are only in it for the crisis. So many of us fall into becoming needy and we really do not see how we can use our experinces in crisis to be of help to others. We do not want to get our feet wet, just the toes. We want to be sponges and not be drained of our energy, time and resources.

Well here is the reality, if we really want change in the way our loved ones receive services and are treated then we need to be advocates.
If we really want newer medicines that have fewer sideffects than we need to be advocates.
If we want the laws changed that affect mentally ill individuals and how they are treated by the criminal system and the mental health system then we need to be advocates.
To accomplish great things you must do the little things.

I'll get off my soap box and let you comment.

Taking it Personal

So many wonderful friends and family members know that our family lives with mental illness. Dustin lives with it each and every day with no relief, his illness and his self-medication choices put him in a state of hopelessness.
We have gone through so many crisis, hospitalizations, living changes, financial stresses, emotional strains as a family that when someone say's "So how's it going, how is Dustin?" that I have to internalize what I am going to say, how I am going to say it and not sound like the world is crashing in on top of our whole family. That is not to say that we do not appreciate that people are concerned and really want to know because they love our family, it is just that it is really hard to be verbal about such a static situation. "Somedays are better than others.", "We live each day as it comes.", "Horrible", "Somewhat stable.", "I really do not know, we have not seen or heard from him.", "Good, he is really trying.", "He's in hospital.", "He's on the street.", "He's using.", "Pray for his safety." These are some of my responses and they run the gamut.
It's is not that we do not want to talk about what we go through, but sometimes I feel we share too much or too little. We have hope in our lives that we try to live out each day. A hope that our son will want to recover, a hope that research will find better medicines for bipolar illness, a hope that he will turn from street drugs and surrender.
So if you know us and ask us "How is Dustin doing?", expect any number of responses for that moment, but it is just for that moment.

READ THIS!

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Have you shared with others about this blog? Have you commented on the posted journals? Join us!!

Challenges

NAMI Glendale has some challenges ahead. What do you think about some of the issues we face. Here are some of my personal favorites:

Growing and still meeting needs. As our membership grows and as more people come to care and share how do we meet all of the needs expressed at meetings? Can we meet them?

Member Participation. How do we encourage more participation at the membership level. Presently the "core" group does so much of the work but how do we distribute some of the tasks among more members?

Elevate our identity. What steps should we take to make professional mental health providers, the famlilies who do not know about us and the community at large to become more aware of NAMI.

What other ideas or isssues do you want to share. This is the place, where we can have some exchange of ideas and work to improve NAMI Glendale.

Coping

How do you cope? Do you have a special skill that you learned or discovered? Just what is coping? It occured to me that how we cope with the stess of living with mental illness may be of benefit to others. Here are some ideas I have had about this method of dealing with stress.

1. Physical Exercise -- I try to exert myself at least 3-4 times a week. When I walk I take music along for the ride to distract my thoughts.
2. Withdrawl -- This was one I learned from my upbringing; do not deal with it withdraw and let it simmer down.
3. Pillow Yelling -- Never worked for me but for some it really is a release.
4. Talk it Out -- Try to sit with someone and talk through what your stressed about, I am not good at doing this I need to cool off before I can talk.
5. Chores -- This one though not my favorite is a great distraction for me, do yard work, laundry. shopping for groceries some type of home related work.
6. Run Away -- Not a skill as I see it.

How do you cope? Give us some ideas.....

Getting Started

Welcome to the NAMI Glendale Blogspot. This space is for members to post and journal their thoughts and ideas. For visitors, NAMI Glendale is a support group for family members and friends of individuals who suffer from persistant mental illness, depression, bi-polar disorder, schizophrenia and anxiety disorders. We provide weekly care and share meetings, advocate for those who suffer from disorders, fight stigma and provide relevant resources and tools to help better understand what our loved ones and we endure every day.